Still Thirsty My Friends?

Beer reviews are COMPLETELY 100% dependant upon my own personal palate and experience drinking...er...researching these brews. I have enjoyed more beers than most and consider myself a connoisseur, but I implore you to try everything I write about and give your own feedback and thoughts

Although my biggest fan calls me a snob I'm not above hitting up the Miller High Life and PBRs (aka the male equivalent of cheap moscato). And for the sake of those of us who are boozin' on a budget I'll get you the best beer for the buck. And for those of us not afraid of spending a little more for a quality craft beer, I'll have something for you too. All around beer reviews in simple terms and plain descriptions. Maybe I'll use some kinda 1-10 Metacritic-esque rating scale...either way you'll know which beer is a "must-try" and which you should only try in extreme thirst or while trying to maintain a buzz.

I will review beers as closely to the standard as I can while maintaining an easy to understand format. Understand that I go on tangents quite often and to those who don't enjoy comedy, witty banter or infectious charm I'll put the bare bones review in large text at the end of the post. Most beer reviews around the web and on print (ie the Beer Advocate aka the Beer Bible) will use certain categories for their ratings. I'll be using those same things but in my own way. Essentially any thing you stick in your pie hole for digestive purposes should be assessed using your five senses. (For those who failed that part of kindergarten here's an example)

Sight = Appearance. What does the beer look like? The colors, the head, the bubbles, the way the foam clings to the side of the glass (known as lacing). All these things make a beer a feast for the eyes as well.

Sound = Carbonation Ok honestly this is not a usual thing to think about but the content of carbonation effects the way the beer drinks. Think of soda...can you drink a flat soda? Nah, goes double for beer. But too much either way will ruin your experience.

Touch = Mouthfeel The way the beer feels on your tongue is of great importance although the taste is, of course, what most will say is the most important. If you've ever had a REAL stout from a draft you understand how that plays a huge role. The thickness of a stout vs the thin bubbly feel of an IPA. It matters.

Smell = Aroma The way a beer smells IS as important as the way it tastes. Remember humans taste with their noses as much as we do with our moufs. A great aroma can improve the taste of bitter swill but a skunky smell can greatly hinder the taste of a briliant brew.

Taste = Um...Taste It's effin taste do I really need to explain how this works? Dammit, ok..it's the way all the things I mentioned before act together on your entire experience. All these sensory observations are the individual first chair performers in the symphony that is beer....if symphonies got you drunk and stuff. In that symphonhy, taste is that crazy homeless mofo Jamie Foxx played in that movie with him & Iron Man. The type of drinking device you use. My personal favorites are the weizen glass, the bottle and the red cup.

Tap a keg, ready your red cups, twist off a domestic or pop open an import...